Within the run-up to NASCAR’s preliminary foray into Grant Park and the Loop, in 2023, Chicago Avenue Race president Julie Geise described the approaching occasion as a “love letter” to the town.
It will be a speaking level utilized by all these bringing auto racing to an city inhabitants that hadn’t precisely been clamoring for it. Former mayor Lori Lightfoot additionally known as it a “love letter.” On NBC, which televised the primary two Cup Collection races right here earlier than giving option to TNT this yr, announcers leaned into using “love letter,” too.
That’s a complete lotta love. Ain’t it grand?
Alas, not a lot for those who don’t really feel it in return.
After three years of this relationship, it’s time — past time — to jot down a “letter” again. This one’s on behalf of all of the denizens of this excellent place who’re feeling smothered, turned off or, worse but, simply plain bored.
Ahem:
It’s not you, NASCAR. It’s us.
Earlier than you motored into our lives, we by no means knew we wanted auto racing on our beloved lakefront. That’s as a result of we didn’t want it. We converse baseball right here. Soccer. Basketball. Hockey. Our groups won’t be fluent in these languages, however we’re. You say “drafting,” we expect Colston Loveland. You say “banking,” we expect Ricketts. You say “ovals,” we expect White Sox field rating. You say “restrictor plate,” we blink like idiots.
Do you see the place we’re going with this? We’d like some house. Sadly, you sort of have this manner of taking over the complete greatest a part of downtown, forcing us to take bizarre, annoying alternate routes simply to keep away from you. We don’t need to need to behave that method ever, not to mention for 2 entire weeks.
We’re simply not feeling fireworks, if you realize what we imply. And also you do, as a result of there have been no fireworks downtown on the Fourth of July. As an alternative — sponsored by you — they happened on the Fifth of July, which isn’t even a vacation. That makes about as a lot sense because the Style of Chicago taking place in September. Was that an affordable shot? Sorry.
It’s simply that we’ve grown aside. Or at the least we’re attempting to.
This actually sizzling man we all know as soon as mentioned, “Life is experiencing new issues.” That sizzling man was Chicago Avenue Race grand marshal Derrick Rose, who was offered with a heavy leather-based jacket that includes the design of the Flag of Chicago to put on as he stood on the monitor on an 85-degree day and yelled, “Drivers, begin your engines!” Have been you attempting to kill him or merely give him heatstroke? As a result of we don’t assume both one is what he meant by “new issues.”
The purpose is, we’ve obtained some new issues we’d prefer to expertise: outdated issues. Outdated issues like a souvlaki kebab, a large turkey leg and a few scrumptious lumpia loved subsequent to Buckingham Fountain in early July, as God supposed. Outdated issues just like the lakefront being a picture-perfect postcard, not a Dale Earnhardt poster.
These previous couple of years, issues have been shifting too quick. If solely the identical might be mentioned concerning the automobiles on the race course. After they haven’t been sloshing round beneath torrential rain, they’ve been caught interminably beneath warning flags. And that’s while you aren’t shifting up a end line by dozens of laps simply to squeeze in an ending. Let’s simply say it hasn’t fairly taken our breath away.
However pay attention, possibly we will nonetheless be buddies? Very distant ones.
One in every of your greatest outdated stars, Kevin Harvick, promised us a few years in the past that issues between us would work out superbly.
“As soon as we get you on the market in individual, we received’t lose you,” he mentioned.
Did you ever actually even have us, although? We surprise.
You understand, a whole lot of of us are saying you’re fascinated by ending issues, too. Is it true? Will your street-racin’ coronary heart quickly belong to another metropolis?
In that case, it’ll most likely be greatest for each of us. Who is aware of? Head on down the highway and we’d even miss you. Hey, you must come again sometime. Perhaps our timing will probably be higher in 5, 10, 50 years.
Till then: Don’t let the turkey leg hit you on the way in which out.
Shoot, that was harsher than we supposed to be. Let’s attempt that once more.
Later, y’all.
